笑侃簡(jiǎn)短英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)

　　“A Speeding Motorist”超速的司機會(huì )給我們帶來(lái)什么樣的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)呢，往下面看哦。

　　An Exceptional Phenomenon(罕見(jiàn))

　　4-year-old Begin and his cousin scrambled (攀爬，爭搶) for toys. His mum told him: “ You are older brother because you’re older than your (cousin) sister. You should give ground to her. ” Begin thought a little but maintained(堅持) : “ My sister must give ground to me when she grows older than I.” His uncle around overheard and said : “Such a thing hardly occurs.”

　　四歲的貝京和小妹妹爭玩具。媽媽對他說(shuō)：“你大，你是哥哥，要讓著(zhù)小妹妹點(diǎn)兒。” 貝京想了想，堅持說(shuō)：“等妹妹長(cháng)得比我大了，她也得讓著(zhù)我。”姨夫在一旁聽(tīng)了說(shuō)：“這種情況相當罕見(jiàn)。

　　新生兒

　　The New Baby Mr.and Mrs.Taylor had a seven year old boy named Pat.Now Mrs.Taylor was expecting another child. Pat had seen babies in other people's houses and had not liked them very much，so he was not delighted about the news that there was soon going to be one in his house too. One evening Mr.and Mrs.Taylor were making plans for the baby's arrival.“This house won't be big enough for us all when the baby comes，”said Mr.Taylor. Pat came into the room just then and said，“What are you talking about?”“We were saying that we'll have to move to an other house now，because the new baby's coming，”his mother answered. “ It's no use，”said Pat hopelessly.“ He'll follow us there.”

　　泰勒夫婦有一個(gè)七歲的男孩，名叫帕特�，F在泰勒太太正懷著(zhù)第二胎。 帕特在別人家看見(jiàn)過(guò)嬰兒，他不太喜歡他們，所以他對自己家里也將有一個(gè)嬰兒的消息感到不滿(mǎn)。 一天晚上，泰勒夫婦正在為這個(gè)嬰兒的降生計劃做安排。泰勒先生說(shuō)：“有了嬰兒，我們的房子就太小，不夠住了。” 帕特恰好在這個(gè)時(shí)候走進(jìn)屋，他問(wèn)：“你們在說(shuō)什么?”他的母親回答說(shuō)：“我們在說(shuō)我們現在得搬家，因為嬰兒就要誕生了。” “那沒(méi)用，”帕特絕望地說(shuō)。“他會(huì )跟我們到那兒去的。”

　　超速的司機A Speeding Motorist

　　A highway patrol officer stopped a speeding motorist. "Don't you know what the blinking lights and siren mean?" he demanded.

　　"Yes, sir," replied the driver.

　　"Then why didn't you pull over immediately?"

　　"I would have, officer, " the man said. "But last month my wife ran off with a policeman, and I was afraid you were bringing her back.

　　一位公路巡警截住了一個(gè)超速司機。“難道你不知道閃爍燈和警笛的意思嗎?”他責問(wèn)道。

　　“知道，長(cháng)官，”司機回答說(shuō)。

　　“那你為什么不立即靠邊停車(chē)?”

　　“我本來(lái)想這樣做的，長(cháng)官。”那男子回答說(shuō)，“但上個(gè)月我妻子和一位警察私奔了，我是害怕你把她帶回來(lái)。”

　　sells the candy

　　Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"

　　"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.

　　"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly.

　　"Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"

　　"She is the one who sells the candy."

　　小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢(qián)。

　　“昨天給你的錢(qián)干什么了?”

　　“我給了一個(gè)可憐的老太婆，”他回答說(shuō)。

　　“你真是個(gè)好孩子，”媽媽驕傲地說(shuō)。

　　“再給你兩分錢(qián)�？赡銥槭裁磳δ俏焕咸�太那么感興趣呢?”

　　“她是個(gè)賣(mài)糖果的。”

　　婚禮上有長(cháng)官在

　　A police stopped a motorist who was speeding on the street. "But officer," the man said, "I can explain.""Just be quiet," snapped the officer. "I'm going to put you in jail until the chief gets back.""But ,officer, I ….""I said to keep quiet! You are going to jail!"A few hours later, the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, "You are lucky because the chief is at his daughter's wedding. He'll be in a good mood when he gets back.""Are you sure?" answered the man in the cell. "I'm the groom."

　　大街上的一個(gè)超速駕駛者被警察攔住了。“但是警官”這個(gè)人說(shuō)道，“我可以解釋的”。“保持安靜”，警察突然說(shuō)道。“我將把你送往監獄，直到長(cháng)官回來(lái)。“但是，警察，我……”。“我說(shuō)過(guò)了保持安靜，你要到監獄了。”幾小時(shí)后，警察向監獄里看了看說(shuō)道“算你運氣好，因為我們的長(cháng)官正在他女兒的婚禮上。他將帶著(zhù)一個(gè)愉快的心情回來(lái)的。”“你確定”在牢房里的這個(gè)人說(shuō)道。“我就是新郎呀”。

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