做一些古今英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)
下面yjbys小編為您分享英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)，希望你喜歡。
我丈夫剛進(jìn)來(lái)
The couple seated in restaurant seemed to be having a wonderful time. But as the woman glanced away from the table，their waiter suddenly rushed over.
在飯館里坐著(zhù)一對夫婦，他們看上去非常高興。但是當那女子向旁邊瞥了一眼時(shí)，服務(wù)員馬上跑了過(guò)來(lái)。
“Madam look,”he said.“Your husband just slid under the table.”
“夫人，您瞧,” 他說(shuō),“您丈夫滑到桌子底下去了。”
“No,he didn't,”she replied.“My husband just came in the door.”
“不，他沒(méi)有,” 她回答,“我丈夫剛從門(mén)外進(jìn)來(lái)。”
有兩條褲子
A young man came home from work and found his bride upset. "I feel terrible,” she said. "I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers.”
丈夫下班回到家里，發(fā)現自己的新娘心緒煩亂。“我心里太難受了，”她說(shuō)。“我在給你熨西裝時(shí)把褲子的臀部燒了個(gè)大洞。”
“Forget it ,” consoled her husband. “Remember that I’ve got an extra pair of pants for that suit.”
“沒(méi)事兒，”丈夫安慰她說(shuō)。“你忘了我這套衣服有兩條褲子。”
“Yes,” said the woman, cheering up. "And it’s lucky you have. I used them to patch the hole.”
“是的，”妻子高興地說(shuō)，“幸虧你還有一條，我后來(lái)就用它來(lái)補了這個(gè)洞了。”
死于肝癌的人100%都吃飯
Wife:You see.According to te statistics on the paper 80% of
those who have died of liver cancer have drunk alcoho.
妻子：你瞧，根據這報上登的統計數字，那些死于肝癌的人有80%都喝酒。
Husband:It's okey. To my investigation, all Thespeopleeat
meals.
丈夫：那就不錯了。據我調查，所有這些人都吃飯呢。
我是單身漢
Jack fell off his bicycle and got hurt.A beautiful young nurse asked him to fill forms. Jack finished them and gave them back.
杰克騎車(chē)摔傷，去醫院治療。一位年輕美貌的護士拿著(zhù)表格讓填。 杰克填好后遞上表格。
"Anything else?"The nurse asked. "Yes," Jack thinks for a while and said "l'm a bachelor."
“還有什么漏填的?”護士問(wèn)。“有!”杰克想了想說(shuō)，“我是個(gè)單身漢。”
狗住旅店
A man wrote a letter to a small hotel he planned to visit on his vacation: "I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?"
有個(gè)人給一家他計劃在假期里停留的小旅館寫(xiě)了封信，“我非常希望帶著(zhù)我的`狗，它很干凈很有教養，你能允許它和我睡一間屋子嗎?”
An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who said, "I've been operating this hotel for many years. In all that time, I've never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or pictures off the walls. I've never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly. And I've never had a dog run out on a hotel bill. Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel. And, if your dog will vouch for you, you're welcome to stay here, too."
旅館主人立即回了封信，“我經(jīng)營(yíng)旅館很多年了，狗從沒(méi)偷過(guò)毛巾，床單， 餐具，或者墻上的畫(huà)。我也從沒(méi)有在半夜因為狗喝醉胡鬧而趕走它，狗也從不不付帳就跑掉。實(shí)際上我們非常歡迎您的狗來(lái)我們旅館，如果它為您擔保，也歡迎您來(lái)。
奇猜異想
Our physics professor was struggling to draw the class into discussion of Archimede's principle of water displacement. He told us that Archimede noticed that when he got into a pool at the public bathhouse, the water rose spilling over the edge. Excited at his discovery, he ran down the street yelling, "Eureka, eureka!" The instructor asked if anyone knew what that meant.
One student stood up and answered, "I'm naked ! I'm naked!"
我們的物理教授千方百計引導我們討論阿基米德的排水原理。他告訴我們阿基米德去公共浴池洗澡，他進(jìn)入池子，發(fā)現水漲高了，溢出池沿。他對這一發(fā)現十分激動(dòng)，跑到街上高叫：“Eureka，Eureka!”教授問(wèn)我們誰(shuí)知道他喊的是什么意思。
一個(gè)學(xué)生站起來(lái)答道：“我光屁股啦，我光屁股啦!”
【做一些古今英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)】相關(guān)文章：
搞笑古今冷笑話(huà)03-26
語(yǔ)言幽默古今笑話(huà)09-29
古今幽默笑話(huà)、故事12-18
古今幽默笑話(huà)段子03-26
一些英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)翻譯12-02
精選古今冷笑話(huà)大全03-26
古今笑話(huà)幽默的故事10-03
古今笑話(huà)的小故事09-28
古今笑話(huà)故事精編08-30