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最新爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)故事
一個(gè)律師打開(kāi)他的寶馬車(chē)門(mén)，突然一輛汽車(chē)駛過(guò)來(lái)把門(mén)撞飛了，警察趕到現場(chǎng)，律師正痛苦地抱怨毀壞了他心愛(ài)的寶馬。
“警察同志，看看他們把我的車(chē)弄的!!!”律師哀怨地說(shuō)。
“你們律師真是物質(zhì)至上，我很不舒服!”警察反駁說(shuō)，“你這么關(guān)心你可惡的寶馬，你可能沒(méi)有注意到你的左胳膊也沒(méi)了。”
律師終于注意到了血淋淋的左肩膀，“天哪，我的勞力士手表在哪兒?”
A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW.
"Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer!!!", he whined.
"You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!!!" retorted the officer, "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!!!"
Ivan came homewith a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bitme," replied Ivan.
"Would yourecognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know himany where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
伊凡鼻子流著(zhù)血回到家里。他媽媽問(wèn)，“發(fā)生了什么事?”
“一個(gè)男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡說(shuō)。
“再見(jiàn)到他你能認出來(lái)嗎?”媽媽問(wèn)。
“他走到哪里我都能認出他，”伊凡說(shuō)。“他的耳朵還在我衣兜里呢。”
-- Waiter, this lobster has only one claw.
-- I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in afight.
-- Well, bring me the winner then.
給我那個(gè)打贏(yíng)的吧
-- 服務(wù)員，
這個(gè)龍蝦只有一只爪。
-- 對不起，先生，這只肯定打過(guò)架了。
-- 哦，那給我那個(gè)打贏(yíng)的吧
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