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經(jīng)典爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)

時(shí)間:2024-10-20 06:03:28 英語(yǔ)笑話(huà) 我要投稿

精選經(jīng)典爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)

  電腦問(wèn)題

精選經(jīng)典爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)

  I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard's DeskJet division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn't solve. She could not print yellow. All the other colors would print fine, which truly baffled me because the only true colors are cyan, magenta, and yellow. I had the customer change ink cartridges,delete and reinstall the drivers. Nothing worked. I asked my coworkers for help; they offered no new ideas. After over two hours of troubleshooting, I was about to tell the customer to send the printer in to us for repair when she asked quietly, "Should I try printing on a piece of white paper instead of yellow paper?"

  我在惠普公司打印機部做技術(shù)支持工作已經(jīng)有一個(gè)月了,有一天我接到一位客戶(hù)的電話(huà),她的問(wèn)題我沒(méi)辦法解決。她的問(wèn)題是:打印機不能打出來(lái)黃色,但是其它顏色都正常。這讓我覺(jué)得很納悶,因為三原色就是藍、紅、黃。我建議客戶(hù)更換墨盒、刪了驅動(dòng)程序然后重新安裝,但是都沒(méi)有效果。我咨詢(xún)同事們,他們也不知道該怎么辦。經(jīng)過(guò)兩個(gè)多小時(shí)的交涉,我打算讓客戶(hù)把打印機寄給我們,這時(shí)候她平靜地說(shuō)了一句:“我是不是應該把這張黃紙扔了換一張白紙再打印試試。”

  誰(shuí)欠誰(shuí)錢(qián)

  A lawyer's dog, running about unleashed, beelines for a butcher shop and steals a roast. Butcher goes to lawyer's office and asks, "If a dog running unleashed steals a piece of meat from my store, do I have a right to demand payment for the meat from the dog's owner?" The lawyer answers, "Absolutely." "Then you owe me $8.50. Your dog was loose and stole a roast from me today." The lawyer, without a word, writes the butcher a check for $8.50. Several days later, the butcher opens the mail and finds an envelope from the lawyer: $250 due for a consultation.

  律師的狗,沒(méi)有拴而到處閑逛,它來(lái)到一家肉店,偷走了一塊 烤肉。店主來(lái)到律師的辦公室,問(wèn)道“如果一條沒(méi)栓的狗從我的商店里偷了塊肉,我有權利從狗的主人那里要回損失嗎?律師答道:“完全可以”,“那你欠我 8.50美元,你的狗沒(méi)栓而且今天從我的店里頭了塊肉”,律師什么都沒(méi)說(shuō),馬上給他寫(xiě)了一張支票。一些天后,店主打開(kāi)郵箱,發(fā)現一封來(lái)自律師的信,信上寫(xiě) 道:咨詢(xún)費250美元。

  打氣筒里面的氣

  The neighbor often borrowed my inflator.

  One day, my four-year-old daughter suddenly told me: "Papa, what shall we do if the air of our inflator is used up?"

  鄰居經(jīng)常借我家的打氣筒。

  有一天,4歲的女兒突然告訴我說(shuō):“爸爸,我們的打氣筒里面的氣用完了怎么辦?”

  視情況而定

  One day a doctor went to a store and bought a pair of shoes. Before he left the shoes counter, he asked the salesgirl: "How long will this pair of shoes last?"

  "It depends. If you don t use it, the shoes will never wear out."

  Several days later the salesgirl fell ill and went to a hospital. And the happened to be the customer she served.

  After the girl got the prescription from the doctor, she asked: "How soon will I get better with the medicine?"

  "It depends." The doctor answered, "If you don t use it, you will never get better."

  一天,一位醫生到鞋店買(mǎi)了雙鞋。他在離開(kāi)柜臺之前,問(wèn)售貨員:“這雙鞋能穿多長(cháng)時(shí)間?”

  “視情況而定。如果您不穿它,那它們永遠也不會(huì )壞。”

  幾天后,這位售貨員病了,去醫院看病。這位醫生碰巧是那位顧客。

  當售貨員拿了處方后,問(wèn)道:“吃了這藥,我的病多長(cháng)時(shí)間才能好呀?”

  “視情況而定。”醫生說(shuō),“如果你不吃藥,你的病永遠也好不了。”

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