簡(jiǎn)單幽默英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)
你知道學(xué)些笑話(huà)的好處么?當第一次見(jiàn)面的時(shí)候,總是有不知道該說(shuō)什么的尷尬,這時(shí)候你就需要一些笑話(huà),來(lái)緩解一下氣氛呢,這里小編為你收集整理了簡(jiǎn)單幽默英語(yǔ)笑話(huà),希望能對你有所幫助哈!
簡(jiǎn)單幽默英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)一:不同職責
I was taking my mother for a drive,and she' d scold me whenever I went over the speed limit. Unfortunately I dismissed her advice,and a state trooper gulled me over and issued a ticket.
每次我開(kāi)快車(chē)超速行駛,母親都責怪我。今天我又開(kāi)車(chē)帶母親出去,結果我還是忘記了她的教侮,開(kāi)了快車(chē)。一位巡邏警叫我停了車(chē),并給了我張罰單。
As my mother and I continued on our way,I complained that he should have let rne off with a warning."Joan,"she said,"I gave you the warning. He gave you the ticket. "
我們繼續趕路,我抱怨那巡邏警不應罰我,應先給我個(gè)警告。媽媽說(shuō):“瓊,我給你的是警告,但他給你的是罰單。”
簡(jiǎn)單幽默英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)二:談話(huà)
First woman:"Working full time and trying to do the housework really gets to me. After work yesterday I came home and washed the clothes and the dishes. Tomorrow I have to wash the kitchen floor and the front windows..."
第一個(gè)婦女:“工作一整天后還要做家務(wù),可真夠我受的。你看,我回家后要洗衣服、洗碗。明天,我還要擦洗廚房的地板和前門(mén)的窗戶(hù)……”
Second woman:"What about your husband?"
第二個(gè)婦女:“那你丈夫呢?”
First woman:"Absolutely not! He can wash himself.”
第一個(gè)婦女:“他絕不用我洗,他自己會(huì )洗。”
簡(jiǎn)單幽默英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)三:永遠是駕駛員!
Our oldest son, Willy, a helicopter pilot stationed at Fort Rucker,Alaska, lives and breathes flying. When he called to say he'd be driving home for Christmas,a 16-hour trip,we were surprised. "Why don`t you fly home?"my wife asked.
我的大兒子威利,是阿拉斯加州福特羅克墓地的一名直升飛機駕駛員,生活、呼吸在飛行中。圣誕節快到的時(shí)侯,他打電話(huà)告訴我們他要駕車(chē)回來(lái),有16個(gè)小時(shí)的旅途。我們嚇了一跳。“你為什么不坐飛機回來(lái)呢?”我妻子問(wèn)他。
"Because,"Willy replied, "I hate riding in the back!”
威利說(shuō):“因為我討厭坐在飛機的后面。”
簡(jiǎn)單幽默英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)四:神童
I taught a "gifted and talented"class made up of particularly bright fifth-and-sixth graders. In the midst of a lesson on the power of observation, I realized that I was wearing two different styles of shoes. Trying to be as inconspicuous as possible,I moved behind my desk and concluded the lesson from there,thankful that the students didn't seem to have noticed.
我教的一個(gè)“高智商”班的學(xué)生全都是五六年級里挑出來(lái)的。有一次上課,當講觀(guān)察的`能力時(shí),我突然發(fā)現自己穿錯了鞋,兩只鞋一樣一只。我盡量裝成沒(méi)事的樣子,走動(dòng)的范圍只限于講臺桌的長(cháng)度,一直到上完課我也沒(méi)離開(kāi)。感謝上帝,學(xué)生們看上去什么都沒(méi)發(fā)現。
The next day,I discovered that my lesson had been learned all too well. Before me sat a class of bright, smiling students—each wearing mismatched shoes.
第二天,我才領(lǐng)略到我的課被學(xué)生理解得有多么透徹。坐在我面前的這群聰明、可愛(ài)、面帶微笑的學(xué)生,他們每個(gè)人都穿著(zhù)不同樣式的兩只鞋。
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