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初中英語(yǔ)幽默故事帶翻譯
Back Up Two Miles退后兩英里
A farmer and his son, traveling by horse and buggy up a narrow lane, met a motorist going the other way. There was no room to pass for two miles in either direction. The motorist, in hurry, honked his horn .
"If you don't back up," said the farmer, rolling up his sleeves, I won't like what I'm going to have to do." The surprised driver put his car in reverse and backed up two miles, allowing the horse and buggy to go by. "What was it you wouldn't have liked to have done back there?" asked the farmer's son.
"Back up two miles," replied the farmer.
一位農夫和他的兒子乘坐輕便馬車(chē)來(lái)到一段窄路，他們遇到一個(gè)開(kāi)車(chē)的人向相反的方向去。兩個(gè)方向的兩英里以?xún)榷紱](méi)有地方可以使他們相擦而過(guò)。駕車(chē)人甚是著(zhù)急，按響了喇叭。 “如果你不后退，”農夫說(shuō)著(zhù)擼起了袖子，“我可不喜歡我將不得不做的事。”司機吃驚不小，掛上倒擋，向后退了兩英里，讓輕便馬車(chē)先過(guò)去。
“剛才在那兒你說(shuō)過(guò)的你不喜歡要做的事是什么?”農夫的兒子問(wèn)道。
“退后兩英里，”農夫回答道。
Dumas仲馬
One day a man was taunting Alexandre Dumas，the greatFrench novelist，with his ancestry. “Why，” snarled the fellow，“you are a quadroon;yourfather was a mulatto，and your grandfather was a negro.” “Yes，” roared Dumas，“and，if you wish to know'mygreatgrandfather was a monkey. In fact， my pedigree beganwhere yours terminates.”
有一天，一個(gè)人在嘲弄法國大小說(shuō)家亞歷山大·仲馬，譏笑他的祖先。 那家伙厲聲說(shuō)：“唔，你是四分之一黑白混血兒，你父親是黑白混血兒，而你的祖父是個(gè)黑人。” “是的，”仲馬大聲回敬：“還有呢，如果你想知道的話(huà)， 我的曾祖父是一只猴子。其實(shí)我的血統起始于你的血統終止的地方。”
Keep feeding him nickels 再喂他幾枚五分鎳幣
A mother saw her three-year-old son put nickel in his mouth and swallowed it. She immediately picked hime up, turned him upside down and hit him on the back, whereupon he coughed up two dimes. Frantically, she called to the father outside. "Your son just swallowed a nickel and coughed up two dimes!What shall I do? "Yelled back the father,"Keep feeding him nickels!"
母親見(jiàn)三歲的兒子將一枚五分鎳幣放進(jìn)嘴里吞了下去，她立刻將他抱起，頭朝下不停地拍打他的后背，他咳出了兩枚一角的硬幣，她發(fā)狂似的朝正在外面的孩子父親喊道： “你兒子剛才吞下了一枚五分鎳幣，可咳出兩枚一角的硬幣!我該怎么辦呢?”孩子他爸大聲回答道：“再喂他幾枚鎳幣!”
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