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2018專(zhuān)四寫(xiě)作常見(jiàn)錯誤盤(pán)點(diǎn)
專(zhuān)業(yè)四級考試就寫(xiě)作而言，許多同學(xué)仍存在不少問(wèn)題。今天，我們以同學(xué)們的寫(xiě)作原句為例，列舉一些常見(jiàn)的共性問(wèn)題，希望幫助大家避免此類(lèi)錯誤。
結構問(wèn)題
開(kāi)頭段 沒(méi)有歸納兩方觀(guān)點(diǎn)
我們先來(lái)看本次考試的寫(xiě)作要求：
The popularization of computer and Internet service has created a group of people called "indoorsy men" or "indoorsy women". They prefer to spend most of their time at home rather than go outdoors and have a face-to-face contact with others. Should people choose to become indoorsy? The following are the supporters' and opponents' opinions. Read carefully the opinions from both sides and write your response in about 200 words, in which you should first summarize briefly the opinions from both sides and give your view on the issue.
這里明確要求，應該先概括正反雙方的觀(guān)點(diǎn)，再闡述個(gè)人看法。而不少同學(xué)并未做到，下例為某位同學(xué)的作文首段：
Should People Become Indoorsy?
Nowadays, with the rapid development of internet, it brings huge convenience to people's life. However, for this reason, some people gradually become indoorsy. As for me, I hold the view that people should not choose to become indoorsy.
顯然，這個(gè)開(kāi)頭引入現象后直接拋出了個(gè)人觀(guān)點(diǎn)，缺少支持者和反對者的觀(guān)點(diǎn)概述，因此被扣分。
理由段 論點(diǎn)不切題
要寫(xiě)好理由段，起承轉合的連接詞必不可少，這使得文章條理清晰，也能幫助閱卷老師找到主要論點(diǎn)，拿到這節的主要得分點(diǎn)。同學(xué)們連接詞的使用問(wèn)題不大，基本都有意識地使用了常見(jiàn)的連接詞，如to begin with, first and foremost, moreover, in addition, last but not least等等。
然而，一些同學(xué)的主要問(wèn)題在于，即使用了這些連接詞，讀者卻很難看出論點(diǎn)所在。如，有位同學(xué)在論述not to stay indoorsy時(shí)有這么一句話(huà)：
Furthermore, you have enough time to shape yourself with little effort, such as using photoshops, reconsideration of your words. These changes are superficial and unreal. Those real ones take your energy and time and come from yourself.
看到這句話(huà)，我明白TA想表達網(wǎng)絡(luò )交流的弊端，但這與主旨沒(méi)有直接聯(lián)系起來(lái)，顯得偏離主題。如果能緊密?chē)@主題展開(kāi)，說(shuō)明if you are indoorsy and rely on online communication這一背景，會(huì )改善很多。
結尾段 過(guò)于簡(jiǎn)略
有的同學(xué)結尾只寫(xiě)了一句話(huà)：
It is hence not difficult to see that being indoorsy men or women is not a good choice for us.
通常來(lái)說(shuō)，結尾段是對前文內容的總結，除了重申自己的觀(guān)點(diǎn)，可以把主要論點(diǎn)換個(gè)方式表達一下，或者進(jìn)行呼吁，以留下深刻印象。
表達問(wèn)題
觀(guān)點(diǎn)過(guò)于絕對
在寫(xiě)作中，同學(xué)們?yōu)榱俗龅絚onvincing，時(shí)常會(huì )寫(xiě)出一些觀(guān)點(diǎn)片面、有失偏頗的句子�？聪旅孢@句話(huà)：
Outdoorsy men can do everything indoorsy people can do.
很明顯，這句話(huà)過(guò)于絕對，是站不住腳的。若是在everything前面加上almost就沒(méi)問(wèn)題了。
人稱(chēng)混亂
漢語(yǔ)重直覺(jué)思維，英語(yǔ)重形式規范。在漢語(yǔ)中，人稱(chēng)的變化使用通常并不影響我們的理解，而在英語(yǔ)中，人稱(chēng)的隨意變化則會(huì )造成困惑�？匆韵聝衫�
Computer and internet service is nothing but a virtual platform to express their feelings, which makes us awkard and uneasy in reality.
We needn't suffer from the noises outside so as to enjoy the tranquil world that belongs to you.
以上是句式表達很不錯的兩個(gè)句子，美中不足在于人稱(chēng)混亂。從their到us，從we到you，變化過(guò)于隨意和混亂。在一個(gè)完整的論述中，盡量要保持人稱(chēng)的統一�？梢赃x用we, they, one等人稱(chēng)進(jìn)行闡述，避免隨意變換。
“讓”的表達
我們曾經(jīng)推送過(guò)關(guān)于“讓”的英文表達，指出在很多情況下，“讓”并不等于let或make. 在這次寫(xiě)作中，還是有不少表達不當的句子：
Being indoorsy can let people settle in a peaceful environment.
英語(yǔ)中let通常表示“允許”的意思，而這句里其實(shí)是表達“使得”，可以用enable sb. to do sth.的結構。
Some are against being indoorsy because it will let their health get worse.
上句表達的是產(chǎn)生某種后果，用cause, lead to等的近義詞匯比較恰當，還可以簡(jiǎn)潔表達為it can weaken their health. 更多“讓”的得體表達，可以回顧推文“讓”等于let和make嗎?
語(yǔ)法問(wèn)題
一直以來(lái)，語(yǔ)法是很多同學(xué)作文的最大問(wèn)題。經(jīng)過(guò)一段時(shí)間的備考，同學(xué)們大都對專(zhuān)四作文的結構安排、行文要求了然于胸，但寫(xiě)出的句子卻總是語(yǔ)法錯誤頻出，無(wú)法取得高分。這恐怕跟語(yǔ)法基礎、寫(xiě)作習慣等密切相關(guān)。以下是此次寫(xiě)作中頻繁出現的一些病句，請大家改正：
As the proliferation of computer and internet service, ....
Some problems may occur. Such as, people's character will change.
Some agree for the reason that it is convenient and make one concentrate on work easily. While others think it is bad for our health and communication ability.
The indoorsy spend much time to get along with themselves.
Due to the computer and other electronic products become common, a sea of people spend much time at home.
Should people choose to become indoorsy has caused much controversy.
Based on what have been discussed above, ...
Being indoorsy is not only beneficial for people's life, but also facilitate their work.
以上這些病句，涉及到as/ with表達“隨著(zhù)”的用法區別、such as/ for example表達“例如”的用法區別、while連接句子的用法、spend (time) (in) doing sth.的用法、due to用法、whether引導主語(yǔ)從句、主謂一致的單復數、not only ... but also用法等語(yǔ)法問(wèn)題，都是寫(xiě)作中出錯較多的，希望大家務(wù)必掌握。
卷面問(wèn)題
在模擬考試中，有的同學(xué)字跡工整，卷面整潔，反映出認真的學(xué)習態(tài)度;也有的字跡潦草，勾勾畫(huà)畫(huà)，隨意涂抹，甚至難以辨認。其實(shí)，卷面是最容易得分的一項，比答對一兩道題目更容易做到。只要認真書(shū)寫(xiě)，卷面干凈整齊，無(wú)形中就增加了印象分。
我們曾經(jīng)的一篇推文，專(zhuān)門(mén)強調了書(shū)寫(xiě)的重要性，見(jiàn)“邊看邊聊英文書(shū)寫(xiě)”，在此不再贅述。只想補充說(shuō)明下，萬(wàn)一在寫(xiě)作中出現錯誤，大家最好不要涂抹!涂抹可能會(huì )使得分下調一檔，可以在錯詞上畫(huà)一條斜線(xiàn)或橫線(xiàn)，在旁邊寫(xiě)出正確形式繼續寫(xiě)作。
專(zhuān)四寫(xiě)作分值為20分，占全卷比重較大。一篇優(yōu)秀的專(zhuān)四作文，內容切題，條理清楚，文章結構嚴謹，語(yǔ)法正確，語(yǔ)言表達通順恰當，句式用詞富有變化，有"閃光點(diǎn)"，基本無(wú)語(yǔ)言錯誤。希望大家多多總結經(jīng)驗教訓，克服以上諸多問(wèn)題，取得高分!
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